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Wuh Yuh Say Podcast
Wuh Yuh Say Podcast

Episode 10 · 1 year ago

CARIBBEAN PARENTING: BENEFITS AND CHALLENGES!!! W/TWOYOUNGFORANOLDTALK | Wuh Yuh Say Podcast

ABOUT THIS EPISODE

I sat down with @twoyoungforanoldtalk to discuss the benefits and challenges of Caribbean parenting that we have faced along with others as children and young adults! Sooo.... LEAVE YOUR THOUGHTS AND QUESTIONS BELOW!!!! and maybe just maybe your topic will be in the next episode!

Well, I mean this is probably the firsttime I' Goin to have to be doing this so like I've done all my interolsbefore so I mean, first of all, guys welcome to we say: Portcast Um, I'mhere with nil and Abriana, who have their ownfodcast Um called two young for an old talk, and I it was necessary to justget them on, because I mean one ther par ASSL. They talk a lot N and I really wanted to get them because,obviously theye are no living. They would have also, I experienced Um a lotof the Caribbean parenting topic Um that we'reboat to discuss, because I feel like it's being trending a lot Um on tite recently asb on instogramrecently. Definitely Noif. You guys would have seen Um the whole little boythat was injured, a no brain di which is obsolutely devastating for her n,her family and obviously ol their prayers o go to them yeah. I don't necessarily have h long for farbock connection with nebut.I don't know if you can remember this sport Id. I conpromate Har Ean, O firm togetherright Um. That was when I was care, like twelve eleven, a Ra yere young.Yes, very! U But yeah! I know they are overseas in Canada and Neil is 'actually say a chef Yo, cants Um Liacha, a shafte dro yeah aew Ay want to go, listen to theirpacast. It will be. The description down below is interesting, UM, listen, I've been behind Ow, they toldthem in the Episso I just recorded so guys going to chet them outbut. Ijust want to get straight into the topic. We're we're dealing withparenting, because it's a really interesting Popuari said where a law ofUS would have experienced. U Caribean parenting, where the ourparents may want us to do certain things where we meet other people andhave friends that are limited and not as free as other children INAN. I Guess N, actually, aSanto usetogrm, Wha Pole, Pu, W classonsticrestions and everything where I wanted to just get some asecial peoplewhat they thought Um on the whole parenty thing. So I will start withthat 'cause just to start Olt 'cause. There wasnumber of them that were um saying and first they P UPE, one guy said:amonecalling names eankou everybody aomos as they realy ar trying to get into this. So one guy,really aunt Um. Why do parents like really mate you doeverything around the house lay. I know ats a love I I know why they do it, but why do you think that a parent wouldwant you to be doing everything around? I was like Chor Oer Okayi, my ASE ready,L it sent from they had to do it forfifteen twenty twenty five years. I now like IFORT TPMOSTERO E, its Gona likeUm. They did their time and no, I a tin. Ithink that an Ho peopl have when they do it yeah. I know some ofthe people might have it,so you don't grow up feeling that everything should be done. For you t tomake a teachy moment s h, yeah, I don't...

...has a case Rey ahuly. It happens formustil reasons, but its ppor O me Tomak yeah. I agree with that and just like them thinking, Oh yeah, I had to D et.You have to do it too Ley Ned Atat kind of thing, but I also think- and I thinkthis is what my parents Kinda did- and I see it a lot more know as I'm gettingolder, that you're living in a household like you exist within that household, so atsome point, Lke you're going to have to do something to help maintain youm. Igot the whole doing everything thing because I felt like that, like younever have a second to breathe lat you lad on. I call again I s dotake St t, Lik take amomentthere's no time for that. I think I don't know how to describe whatthey're tryined to do, but for me I've seen the benefits of that kind of likeparenting. I guess we're calling it um now come of him. I work ethnic likeanlike. Now as an adult, I in all the workplaces I've been in since living onhere. I just work like nothing andeverybody's like Ar You'e doing so much hor you, like always just on top of Ay,just keep moving like. I do things at Tho being asked and, like that's how myparents Washd me like they raised me to be fromhm yeah, all the time a when Iwas fifteen, it was fricking annoying. I as like you could give me a secondand late. I don't always want you doing something. You know I just Wan to do.TATTHING OAOM and I didn't understand it then. But what I'm twenty one Nouanet very thankful so Y, is it away b? I think they have gotintentions in doing it, but also you need to like you. U have to understandyour parents because they think some parents kind take out mountage UAND,Serdin scenarios, you often know or try to know your caryeah mean, as you guys said, really and surely, where you it's a titat sort of thingand that's what another person did say in the M thing like they said, train upa CHOLN, the way he should go and when he is old he woild not depart from it,which is basically what you guys are saying Um. But in that senses, wherepeople do talk about Tiffotap, where some parents may Bequ I've gone out, as I'm sure Tou see as it was with Harsan College,I mean there's that whole thing with keeping our her a certain way. And allof that- and I mean it's not necessarily appearin as in a biologicalperio, but that's a kind of apparenting in e sence, where M teachers do lookoff ter you and not something. Not My parents, wil always said okay you'regoing to school PICNAC teachers are basically your parents away from home.So then t yeah, so it's like they alwayst saythat yeah. So it's always a respect, sort of thing Um, but even Ith II, withthe hear like Bte you Lik Wif at their pictures. It's like okay, you had anOffro, so lk Yow. How your her like this? Whyyou doing this? Now? That's my nod. L. My brother will like when my brotherfirst started to brow his hair. It was like Thet W Railae, but I was I actalike unehty or whatever, and then I don't know he hasn't. Is Our revelationto see that ungle so yeah, my mom ner had a personal, pobem,Meer, aget, neat or WAA. I mean like her to e long, but it shouldn't bepcifically wild. You know, sometice...

...bake up and go. I Lo be Lokyeah BUfrest lat up, ao Bu, sho M Obe, looking like I ust a care or whatever eah a yebut.Definitely well. We have the same. Our depy Principale, I think, went to bethe principal there so that Moe Gess aloal the OL years. We've heardthe story. They won't Roh. It was very much Um. A soon o started getting t seniorschool an ye become like some tha people look up to ot school. They say:Okay, Theyr, Hammer Don, so yeah that may last three four years. I kee see, UA to say very miicent, almost and PO, how erethey're trying to lat. You know ye every other day doing hear checks likehe's spending, Howanyou, Knowthinki Abou, that much money and on the agebudget went to teache. Look at people sang. It's not impartto anything else, butit's just to thing for them. MHM See, I guess it a kind fparin th. It tries tomake it uniform, which I get the a behind it touche degre butlike. Youknow, then you get th different. I guess perspective when I resit okay, myhair is in tidy two entres as a obvious black meal Um, I thin myhouseone one. Does a leter complexion with a different H Hertye when theyhear he samlengt or theers longer is scil meat, so they don't Anon O to cutit. Even though we have this whole rule in the gread bukers like her must be lessing. Two inchesAsaaboutso, my hair is probably two indredt me pulling it from the rootstraight ut Butyou have somebody else as latas um kin or with a differentHerti an I o. that's fine at Tab'soly, good yeah, yeah, O Kindo, wishhs, pbil, SOM colonialism, Umcolnet show U Nowor meas much looking back. Well, I mean that clain would lead to hm past them protecting us and as Iguess you could look at it Ikthat, but then hat nlotaces me at to my nextsubetopic, which is where someone asked me this, and I did have it as well inmy nose as well, which is does like overprotectsiveness affect therelationship between a child and a parent, because there's a lot ofparents that I know I mean not an some friends T. I have that. Aren't able todo certain things because the well as children ask ourselves. We always areon thisage. We wantto have we mentioned a in uopisode with just caing freedomand eltrepenertion so mean you always want out freeom tojust go and do your own thing. 'cause you're, not Gettang, into Adolt, H andall of that. So, being twenty eighteen youre know basically an adult, so you want not freedom and if a parentisn't along you to do some things when you're seeing your other friends do it? Do you think that that is somethingthat is a problem? Or do you think that iagain still looking to the future, I'm develoring that forlater anokers Ohnoi? I think they, if there's poby some goodindpent with it, but also everything that I'm saying that you're sayingreally peakng from obviousy ar experiences with our erents, but at the end of Thesi her atYprseragan, my Mosturnadion, I don't know I feel like I had apreetty decent experience being that I was the oldest child and I was a girlUm. So I was my parents test and child foreverything. So I feel, like I had to talk a bit morethan I see m a younger sibling having...

...to because I essentially pave the wayfor a lot of the Iran I just get not necessarily get away with, but almostto say get a pass because my parents know the outcomer Cana understandisituation better, where there is like schooling, guno having people overlatethose kind of things, because they went o all that with me Um, I I don't think my parents areoverprotected, but in a situation where you might feellike they're, not giving you the pase that you want or you're, notwinning in a situation h. Now that I look back, I can definitely see likethere was probably good and time where they had a solid reason for doing it.Whereas me an my y, our last year is JS Lik you just don't. Like me, L K. Whydo you not Li Tot? Why whyare you fighting me so much like I, you kindofli e. If you love me wit, Lat me have xlater by atime. You start saying thatyou just saw like a Bratlikeo juspes yeah it at Anyou. Love Me, you wouldgive me like. No, I think I don't know I'm saying this for liketwenty one year old out, othe Lak, remi thinking, aout foinenteoter, and by that like I would not have taken thetime to like sit and understand like where is my mom coming from or where ismy dog coming from when they say thit or why are they doing this? What benefit does this Haw, but no, Ican like yeah, like I probably won't fight withmy parents now or if I do it's going to be like over adult things. So I don'tknow I overproductionist cane dmadin Um. You know Y, you thinkabout sheer tep, BER depostors children might be rebellious, Beuiyou, knowyou're, so strict or Y. U You keep essis routine that then they just kind of Wen, I st theydon't know. So I feel like, obviously you an O sex child. It does more than acom, a positive place. crosseboard. I think that you have to deside. Bsyou want to win o Con Co. ASTaparently. Wasn't he really wan? They don't do t rea Mak Sur Te. Do it youaround them or Ith your guidance other Pol telay, trying to give him nothing.You got to give somebody to grown athing Um like for me. I guess the context is IAMTHE ELDEST TRIVAL Mon secos. I O job on my dad's Sai Omy. Second moveer ElvisUm. So you know t I didn't have to told OLand Li. I ran on Jis. You know the ste, Jo, you kind of get h. We want orwhatnot Um, but I feel tlike. My mom definitely FTbonced out pretty well L E. There was a lot of things that you kind o wondered.I, U start to become a individual and approaching the eighteen. You know whatwomen Kotheir actual e wons n. Why that when you're like in a schoo environmenseeing people with things I I know for my brother now, gowing on and playng,everybody has an ifl Ana e ehe comeat home a don on my parentscluties. So he want to sat he Wano Iishe K. I did not have no blasted, Ijust just ease off. I think insluence as a Bosyou, I he social media liketheres, so much more aware of whatever this I doing. You know this person's porting,everybecn and EP. Has such a great life like mummy ieaointhistomhm, Araly, Um,finy Bouance, his key, my mom was 'toverly protective. She reiated S Awos. She had a you ol she on a chair e,...

...a Oli going ae. You know my mom, Ithink my mom, I don't think anyon the per EOMAS, pretty darn close because she was wone to learn. Hear me an Kinda understand where I wascoming from, you know would be dead, set o her raised. I she stuin but cn bethat Julios that she's in it Forsoli n moder an you CI, okay, she a Onin, etorand Yo, so many Oga, but she like Alast, had that conversition t n MHM. Shewould somebo Hos Lsyeah. She was into. Let me get H R, a little bit: knowledge,ENANEPROBAB, NO MN! Let me make a mistake, a kind of ee thing I would get Roale solway through yeah. I feel home itis hard Enou to tokeep up as with e children. Being so much aware of all the popular things that are being done, wit,the Apera okay, my friend has a bran car. I M Om ie, I got roundon par, youknow, I mean yeah and they M Wen. The Carmen Ting thayeahpeople are allowing.I don't know. I guess you can try to talk to your parents as O. I husrlucky that my nurs well listen and taking INESN, even if, after they stilisten to me, they still have the name answer they knewatthe time to listen towhat I was sange m yeah. Well I mean, if you never not, you just had the word.Listen they this S, something that I know a lot ofpeople then say even if it isn't about parenting and if on talking about arelationship or Um, just even their peairs or their friends, their bestfriends, R. Whatever is like one person put in their their answer and Sai thatparents will refuse to communicate with children because they think that theyno more than e child and Chi, should have nosaany matter and ats. I meantatlike even ouh like we match. You sometimes hear. There's the me is likeOh um, your mother comes home and does or said something and if you saysomething, Andh Paren is wrong: theyethey're, just Gongto tey you ortey you to do something or they're going to get angry. So a so listening, I guess is a really keything I mean, but parenting is something that youdon't Ust, don't mind: Youal being a parent. You know you have to eitherlearn from your parent or that you e just diving and whatever happens. Youtry to be your best to correctit or m most of it because asMewsi neels, the only a the onteing person, so you have to Tryk your best to have thatbalance N in that sense, but Um there's another thing: the same personsaid where they relate tha rguardess of the age. As long as you live under yourparents' roof, you must abide by all rules and do as thsay. Nothing that the parent says is wrongwith you. You know because they provide so much they provide for you Um and ifWac they prevade for you. They believe that they're doing that they're, a goodparent, I think at's Al is Tegam as well were Um on a mean right wheresomebody was like. As long as a parent provades tat to be Li good per mbut me person, Ithink its more Thanou. I Ito so communication. Definitely Passno!That's not a cap of e Oin bect. I can definitely relate to and respect thewhole if you live in unerneath, my roo roof. You bite him by my rules, kind. Othing. I think there has to be some leniencewith that lovel an I feel like. I got...

...that INSERNIN situations with myparents and Tine with my family that I live with now, or also Ting, O becarban,her 'cause. They were born and we ad in Itabian Um, whereby, yes, you have setrules but like as your kids or s as young adults. Getolder like there are certain things that you should be able to give somesort of Leway with and have like a Givante, but that's very important.Give Ade and my mother has been taple pretsure for this. For my entirelife lat, if you want to be able to take, you have to be giving Sak wa, notwhat I said Earli but late, helping Ou, I your hosewol ten, he say tat. Youcan't expect to be given all this freedom and be given certain things andbenefits and not workfrut as atly. It's not fair, yeah good yeah. If a describe the Caribbean Peri,so e Kindof, like do as I saying all thet, do, 'cause kind af go B, HearYour Dad o you don like look it mic. Ou Hol your parents matter find out whowas lacing to da even teachers. W have the same thing: Oh myparent! So then shNAT Indo, my brother, bought at that TPNO O. I remember Hso, it's kind of l.You know they hade their experiences and asthey've going through and they kinof have a no or an idea of how it's goingto portent. Put you know: Ju, Hey, don't want to se? U We're down a as Owher, they ma mold onto this, but you know you Kinda They'e Gon, to have to give that pace.L, like I said you got pick Om en o bitle you Gol Lov, en to I experience I bkay. I actually don'twonder this, but obviously you don't Wan that a twelve year old child sayyeah. I want I toport at you. Yo Gonta go becide it, but I feel like it really has come down SI working further for me, a lot of ththings that I wanted. I could realy only even consider getting it. If I putin Ework know m education was a big thing for a Monms, late, really Makinsure I on GE report at Evr home a befor it atreally going to be, like you know,Cilutations, and all these breefings, I don't G E, B or Wever, but like if Ihave lie Abid report discussions. You know eating in your plan that you knowHowr Yeu going to prove it. What are you going to do to make it better nexttime? And you know how a you gonna want to get Xaz you're, not working for so Ifeel like trying to find that bilence. But I don't know everybody HOS itreaslike yeah, it Os easy and I think something ous,I'm autknowledging a lot more now and I feel like a lot of people have beendiscussing more, is that our parish are also individuals. I think noetimes. Ionly now understanding this morning, but I think gring Oup, like you're, notthinking about it like that, if you're not seeing them in another like otherthan your parent, like you're, not acknowledging that Lat, your parent hadto grow up to like they have their own her, that they might still be dealingwith Throtrou Tay. They have their own friend groups, they have like what theylike and what they don't like, and all that kind of stuff. So as easy as it is to just want to pickmatls and Belate, you just he's giving me a hard time. Just becausely US beamean just because if you also have to remin yourself, I ceer through yeah andthere an individual do there processing things in their own way andBik Andon exactly I fho I was lucky enough to because of my uniqueturenting situation. I always was able to de my parents as Inv an so they hadother stuff or the do or their own lives outside just parenting and MHM. II was interested in you know how it was...

...for them growing up. Even if you don'tget full story. Yo O e Hear Something O. Oh yeah, you know backto my da she useto have to Wat freneis Bee Dra in everroom. You know just L K thoseinteresting stories, so I think that kind I low it for me that I have apictum my died in my room, an back home, andnmy husand, a Fo Lik, he likeseven years La Oh. You hearabout this low one, seven I ridiculau er, so yeah Um. I feel like tatthosekind of things lke. When you are aware of Li okay,this person had to go through you trap trouble. Then maybe you can give hemthe benefitte DOE B'cause. That makes t easier to understand their decisions right, and I mean just as you guys arejust saying it frompoint, where they are individuals. There are some parentsthat do say 'cause. Another person did say that parents do tend to say thething, whereas like parents in a choher should be seen, ondnot heard, but I mean the person did G to see that itcauses a generation of followers and not original thinkers B. I don't. I can't necessariy fully agree with it,but I see what theyare saying and ewas going bout to where we were sayingthat you know therere Um, I guess that's for Austrity we were weAE't. We were fortunate that we weren't Um. I was heavily treated or Gotn muchcarba punishment as another childwood becauseyou see you say that you broughthome a BOT report. You know it's Hoking, you fix this yeah. What are you goingto do to fix that and make ha solution, whereas for another child you know ThaMoin a on also is ju n oon Ye Tepane by Ers. Also, I find more so living uphere. We've seen the flitside of that which, instead of there being like fullon discipline or like a balance between discipline and then some sort of likesus salution, is just flon like sae, like Oh, my God, e n to by he wol. Do that again. Okay, I oagree to the Mo oe recording an episodes. E little boy was on a bike.With his MOM B Sad, her n, he was Renin to up the street across th. The rural looking te or rate all Yocould hear is. I can remember his name name as Saleri. I shews Sho by wouldnot come out for good two or the minutes, so she imerge mut up, stoppedhim and then Pu of E bt. You know rabbhis hands, Sohundes, wor, okay,that's talks, t me: What do you feeling? What are you doing like? If I wasmanand? I was holding hen I as e whole Ho justerunning away on a bake. TheySAI for a Neweel t, so he nevea Loki and he's like for six seven Tola. Hedoes being harders. I'm misking life cause oer P on curse. So, for me it waslike okay, you know, Yoo gotta be actually careful. Ritmos O, listen,yeah, btis, ites ifing across the room with that Oino MRUES. That was me. It was. You were Goingta F,our ARY rercussionlate, letting you know that you did something wrong, butthen also or like. That was not good enough. Whatever you did hot youperform, but also giving you that space to be lit. How are we going to work onthis because Ey needed to get bass or late like this is notly Standard Eni,an B o a been Ay, more and Ody Igt? So I mean Yo, you need to talk aboutbalance. Do you guys think 'cause I mean you have here with the oldeducation thing: Wi H, whoas a major part, and I do agree with that, so how let's take away their generation? How do you think thatI we, as the younger generation curn Koratda, to make that biolence? Because...

...do I mean we're in the West, butobviously I'm tri to separate carbn from America and Canada Uro, where theCaribbean, as we know, is a bip stricter? I guess than othercontinent so Um. How do you think that we would be ableto correct tha and have that balance of okay? We know whenn to communicate,went to be strict, went to be disciplined Wenn to be easy, going N,let them even trust them. 'cause th trust is a very big thing in parenting.'cause. If a child isn't trusted, then they are going to rebel even more soOll. Do you guys hin that we can correct that and make that better,figes Dobees I'll? Try, because I'm I'm thinking about that a'm, trying tothink about how my parents navigated that becausethey think that they did that pretty well. But the only thing I can thinkabout is Itso much so because I talk so much like myparents were able to understand me so well, because not a study that I waslike over sharing or Onow AK. They don't know every single detail about me, obviously,but I shared so much of myself with them that they were able to understand how can navigate me and like went lik.They know went to talk to me n Wen, not to talk to me hat wouldbe like exactlybece Henexet, they went tand talk to me. I went not talk Meso as a big woman,iner hose only O. I can I T at my door. Well, ten Atihtmany, that's not whatI'm getting out here, Um morsly at what you said that if whatdid you say, Oserol things you mean weal, it is now ctbaalthey know or the newyes when togive me space, that's what it was when to give me t e pace and when t when I need attention, I guess nowwhen I need support innocent, but if you're not in that situation, ecauseyou just don't talk as much as me. I it's, as we said, like parenting, ispretty frigging, weird and hartned new and there's there's no manual as we satfor it. So I think we have to as kids, sometimes take a leap of faith and TAT in a way or made tnat first settill that our prensow lk. Ok, well we're good to communicate right now orlet talk abl xwainsyour Om filer. Can I let you know about this situation?Whatever the case is and then V from there and depending on the response youget, you can know how to navigate, but it's kind of hard because everybody has been put in differentsituations and you might not feel that you canapproach your prents in that way. Not Honesty! Sometimes you might be right,ywhere, you just can't, because whatever your parents have dealt withthat, have brought them to the point where they are no with you they're notable to navigate ot with you wor they just haven't experienced that or theydon't know it's all like Hollin Arror, yeahther n their mind. It doesn't evenmake sense to to listen to fe that moning time y Lidig under Schot or Det, or you know my parents always just always oni me isresiryeah y. exactly so, it's so weird because those things are bond, an of inyour mind and neither you nor your parent are like talking to each other.Actually Enlake, oh W. I thought you were going to do. Onoor O. I thoughtyou were okay. I thought you were rejistlike having a moment te andnobody's actually saying it aloud, h.

So S Idon' know. I guess I just got lostlucking to I talk thingin, the s should come to me. I don't know when,after a certain point, I feel Ik. We never had a by communication, but wehad really good to education for a lot of M teenagehood Ersm, my momwas alwayclose to me close both my parents, but I feel as though our communication wasat a level where it was like. If I was feeling wrong or n bad has bacenAraomoode, armovs or whatevershe. Okay, Ye want O Ini space. I was OAS, an emotional child, so I maymotion the show and Sein on a TA oAton or speak no hat. I mean despitful B Ow You playdown MN yeaolike Itwoul,be like you just like nudge things, af it to her Youe. Just like dropsomehingoa little bit, O less Curln Y. I feel like Um a in also like you beless Ta 'cause. I CCAN be talking Ta Mercartis blace. I don't even want tobe hearingsoyeah Um. My mom picked up on out well and a lese o tall to likeanythat came up too so yeah she do is Goo for me Ioso. I feellike the main thing that if I did have myparenting situation, Myou know he things to Chage yourself. N Relas willwork for you whateer or you grawout, not en. I think we spoke up with thispreviously, but talking to those people that were successful when youwere beingraised and Li e, the girl, why did it Xae or how could they? How do theythink they could improve it? That W LIK? You have a basis ast what Bas yourcrsell, also tothe e tties level. It's Kindo like in most things. If you don'task you yo, never know, Yo d! Think you now S, dropping you ownexchrisses, but get in both sides. I how you felt with the other child, howthe parent felt with it that could help you form. You know a higher levelundersonding for yeah 'cause. That's a rerly shad habit that I think a lot ofCaribbean parent tape on the whole man of like this is how I was raised. Iknow it's wrong. I'm fully aware that this I did not do me good. No, the ISThas to Lod it er unsolved Pamma, an like issues from this apparenting andfrom hall my parents dealt with this. I know it's wrong. All I knowso I is God to see Yu too, I I what it isreally have to offer. As you said, it's like taken that leap of Fath andactually like saying Lik. Ok, why not try this like I'd rather we'vd beentalking about this a lotlike I'd, rather it be o well than a w or all youcan know. What do you? What do you have to loseother than something not working, O orlike somebody's Ame? No, I think it alot better to do it that way than to continue that generational trauma andher I rabajust bawling over anithing, our generation's really realizing that that kind of work, like I think, justaae, really good yselv for Temedia, have been you can augulate better like HowweKindo, like re s, a trok around caan yeah. You know these kind, o things arevery similar like social Melo. For that, because, obviously you might know ndifferent country, but you know the connections som more personal, now yeah,it's really a Lo Eslit, this apes, so lug Li, maybe there's a reason behindor great I comperisin thin. I think there is but Eie yeah I mean this is I guess you could put thisnecessary, isn't Um!...

A Caribbean thing is apparence thing ingeneral, where there are the high aspectations, where there's thistheorotyte, where Um some Indian parents, maybe wanting heir child to todo this, and the Chinese pyramid wouldbe like Oh, I saw family gay. Theyalry made that sjst s joke and Onday episodes, Um and Inbarbados. I guessyou could say that a lot the aparents have that whole ideology: Race, okay,Um, you have to be a dotor, a lawyer and the Lov of people t go TaesonCollege, an Er, cleenesh collars, where a Kno GAA was just like his his die edoctor, his mom's a doctor and 's, like you, have to be door. Noyou often notdo the AV Laante the time to goter lesson so that you get towards dotor alawyer whatever it is, and you have to do it this, where there isn't that freedom or they can cat, where they canjust just discover it for themselves because yeahthe teenage t to be in a teenager, you always want to figure ou stuff on yourown y. You want to know that somebody'slike behind you or you have somebody in your back pocket. If you mean you also,as you said, you want to be able to figure things out for yourself and Ithink that's a big part of being apparently being able to give yourchild that space mh to be like figure out what you want to do. Okay, ifyou're taking empteen years to do it, O may Mi it on Hav I cha Ele. Let's tryto Narrowi only aptions anthing, but I think both of us can say we're verygrateful that our parents- I had not minds that, where they let usfigure, it out, make a decision and Eltimatey tick to it. Isupport you're,going through aoer on or we wouldn't be, pursuing the frinkthat we tis tprobly, not Bein Cano, specifically yeah, like even if I ipreparents allow be to to fabout having them Sppo. Cannot they mak give e suggestions, as te will thing,but like m keeping, is not ing it upon somebody else. 'cause somebody want to do something andsomebody being forced o something Arcompley different that way a hol in in the in Oramecas for the badris children go to the College, auniversity that't where the parents Wantt to do it. He's not ane struplingtwo years ar thisaand run agree to together, peolabut hat's, not reallyhelpful, FOT anybody 'cause one they're peploying ones in the house- wet Tetthey're, not trying to use that SOS Li okay. They wish e time to waste,hom money and then Toh, the parent, definitely listin money 'cause. Thechild obiosly had O mant to go college. Sixteen or something. But I feel like s for me my Mama. She was really Mi Dat to they e reallylike. What do you want to do? Anican alwaysknow eone to do hon, thirteenish Um. Obviously you know different thingswill come up an you get friend Sa okay, Maye ont. Do this my mom's really goonTa, like you, know, haw any an do e, don't Lok it up and don't fe e to FocUppe, Foo Mine and even going to college Kpo e, something because at q cI was doing sciences fom. My last arears I stopped doing Um Ficien in fitforms oway. It was pure science, I'm Ou for the last F years there. So I was Rtouchd with it from that asperthey. Obviously, Fook ut home t e Sae oeahyeah are the other day at school. So I guess they as apparently challenge come fromhaving that expectation. But then you really just te about Ti II, suggest Iokay I'LL LIK TO S wo. This a maybe give her bit of contects 'cause. Ifthat we don't often et that context, be a Chon he mentels be aimuch likethis is what it is because I say so. I given that Bx storyhout wite, becauseobviously they have a reason for...

...everything. It's just t. They pick inchoose what they WANTTOJOI Ayodytey want you to know t a lot of the tems.Is You Satlat? If you get tat contacts like situations, become an easier pillto swallow, because you have that box storony, you tan, you migh, not agreewith it, but you don understand where they're coming fromjust ContinuenB'cause, you guys were basically just saying about you- know just having tofeed them. Everything and I do definite nything is supporting Fort Sa.Parenting is definitely, as you said, you want to D dife into it yourself.You just want to have that person behind you. I theus that should be oneof the mean things bout being up here and just to support your child, but not make them do something. So, Hey, andeven you said, you have the last two years doing um sciences and mean, but some personsthat are doing those last two years are even not cumbinations. They have thatpressure to to behind them that you have to do well, and these last twoyears are 'cause they from reception to cost too. You know w a you're doing,atllays head and then Gos tren Cot for is oky CE Hummer down.You have that pressure. No, you have to ready decite your future, because ifyou don't what to a or Werrs de school you'd know you're not going to be asbetter off as you b an Latt Nigt tossible chooling boning, which ath you guys mention it ou one of yourpoookayyou did you did Mymom my dad' Servan? That was really much point of it already mittere. Whatschool you go to it might, as we do at school yeah, but yeah, thereis N, I itsjust Liim, but I went to ar in school Ohokay, so my cousin Ilive wit. Falo went out in school an they. The different things. It's kindepends on WT, Popu, Andi Anoqot, but like for me that Eed, the Git tol my momafter you cominasi pass oing. That's 'cause, O one. He ereaction M, actually wasn't mi or anything. So itwas like the an that ands in Theo, a proseactually didn't poss os a Motprobaly, a person it was like hm s was the bolying it. I feel that Ididn't have that much pressure gree into common entrance Jones, tatiesAspectli. Obviously there was LoC crefission happening, but I guess Adit was neverlike a doerda Ini MHM s, which is, I guess, Benefiso, because the LP don't have itl Kethat or that Exac Thi Isa, women right yeah, then PHICXC. I only found out si O hada concept of it and I would do se reaise things up at that point, butlike in Coss three S I was like. Oh sorry, s, forer Li. Oh we actually Cyeer. Next was ' s C sa like I was rarely saying that s Thi pessionhappening. Even I wasn't aware cause AC C MHM GICM te pecute for it. Since thesecond former thing, a Weus Nesyese oe was cosial M Soa. I pressure. Wasn't there for o start. IITwas like this fo Gom Anddong kind of thing. Obviously, as you get closer to Thatt,when you Sart to feel Thake, okay, this actually something happening O, but Iremember it. After fifth forn my Momma em sit dow N crunchyg numbers.I saw how my people CACN Gnto, six fo Ha di thefifth for and is Liy aredicousty small percentage, especially fornb q c, so that would emiss mor soas Lik. Really I got to do be itpossible ISYAHTHAT's, probably themain point Wasi had for the crunch, but it was even like that bad because youstill have a support for friends- and...

...you know, family was oe there in asense but MHM. If every exam ae going without kind of feeling it probablywouldn't have been. I probably would have ended up going toSan Paparinto, because mmthat mental drain is not fun. Nand a set such ayoung age too. They how people put pressure at common entrance level. They you could graduate from your secondaryschool and still not you have a defiing like Hibea of what you want to do. Idon't not woll having a life plandl by ther forman before all canalonstood,I'm not here, for it, yneither of us are doing what we studied of Te Locate.So the fact that you mean to like base your studies like, obviously, if youhave a plan I want to go here. I want to pursue this like for shore tail yourstudies up until that point to that, but otherwise that unnecessary pressure is literallyunnecessary, yeah for sure and one o t divences oething ats welldeeper. Now, because I mean there's a lot of people that you would have seen Um, you know there's people at f schoolou that you hear about that. You know their Aparent Co. I member specificallyand WN. Some ofthe herizines might be able to Relat on memory. At least thathere was this one guy that I don't know why he did. But I rememberhis mom just came to school and he was beaten. Don't know if yo got AbantirsonCollege, you know tha quadrangle, Atre right his mom just O ane morning justcame bee him right there. Li Ke and you know people then howthey always say inall that tisabl environment and all that. So I child me til school Junetoday, Nverso l. What do you guys think they are Bodatcas, there's a lot ofchildren that Arlida and then they then leads to pretty bad future. But then they arethos pay those children who do have a good environment, but still resort tothose like, like even Jerry, in a sense Gan from that he said: okay, it waslite, be cool or whatever. But what do you guys think about the parents who cre about body environment and then Idon' knowhe's Kindo they're surprised when Shtin Bot happens? Oh my God! I I don't know a word. I would use todescribe that honestly, just wilds. She has a it'sits definitely a level of ignorance, because how you pretend, because you're pretending atthat point to be oblivious to the environment you've created and youfoster at home that you're mobly springing out of yourself onto yourchild lake. We said I've said there's so many times everything has learned:behavior, lk, kids literally watch everything you do. That's how we learnto speak T's, how we lean to read and write everything it's based off ofseeing other people do it and a lot of times those people are OPR. Parents Ol. Yes, I think there's an exception where,when you might be doing things subconsciously or you might not realizethat you're pushing out things ascertainy whenyou're in a hosefold environment and your child is picking up on them without you realizing or maybe you'redoing it, and you just don't Giv too set o pickinup on it, which is equallyas five, but I definitely think there's some sort ofignorance and allowing that n entertainint that kindof behavior and environment at home and...

...thedn, seeing it outside e home on onewhee. We we GOTT fomwhwhere's this coming from late. I remember one dayand foundation O sqared somebody like through we had a snow commenter that used tocome in all these school pamesis. Every evening after school I mad, I came topick me up and I got into car. IMPONATION KINDOF has a corodabl a egt.She does Er. He picks me up at the top IGWEVR and we come an eaeside to baltysecond gate as SOM little boy. I was low Boyloro. I don't remember what itwas 'cause I was traumatized had a snow horn. I threw their atwosnow. Hong Cot was a Lo and at ice on the grass instead of Jis walking to thegarbage school is all everybody's going home imi a o car truck an just started,yelling ot a kid I kinda. I won't say how he said it, but shes'pl ask if theydo that at home and if they throw garbage on floor and theyre living roonin their bedroom and the body obviously responded. I said no because hello, no at so why? I not hear it like Wa was't meaninwen. I hear pick it up inm going put in the garbage. I might Aveae waited for the kitcen to get up and go Pi'am just sitting there likeeverybody around is looking a just Oleto and I'm Likei meathis is a greatlace. Last temmer really did everybody had to seemeer anyway, like that kindof behavior that you don't. I don't know you have to know not aany time of pace because thereisno time to be Ting, garbad, onte, Garnd, withnot AICEA example, but I think that that example leads intowhat you said about some people. Don't necessarily have t at Everman at home,but because of the environment they have, they feel they need to do certainthings outside the house. He has its like a no I'm free breath of freshairlake. I can know be who I want to be Wa, I be the person I think I want tobe. oneight conform to some sort of nising the whole late who said Jay saidlike being cool. He nehold hes standards. You want to see you want toBewa everybod what you see this person is being myou. on't know where thatperson come from the type of circumstances. Tey have about home.Anything like that, but you see them. You think rgt thats, that's the Woll!That's what I need to aspire to beat me and you leave your household wherethose sort of things are not accepsible a Wi said I do them and in that ISS asa parent, I would wedon Ethawas Shan. I agree yeah. Well, I mean I'meven a big deeper thing I mean I I mentioned at the beginning about thewhole Um, the parents ante Gy, the little boywho's no brand dead, Um Thare was hobiis conversation with Um a couple of EUR friends. Fraday Friday im he honestly as parofy.What Wali you do now. Do you really take responsibility for this? 'cause isyour obviously people are saying N, it's not it's not purpose. Nobody atthat age. I would think at T. I would love to think that at that age you werenot purposely trying to injure or kill somebody or may nobrain than so asapparent. How do you recover an? What do you say to to wantthe other parents too? To to ther the new, the media that are going to cometo you and ask you questions, you know: 'cause you're O pressured 'cause. Theymay not even have about environment. I know th judge or think whatever they'redoing at their house, but it may not be badnve. Maybe- and...

...you know your child's no done, this wonhow you go from there really. I mean I feel like onf thereas lordebate about it, Beweenan poof. You know understanding why Peop Migthave Imigt Wan. I Go Abou Etenmy, child or e other people e saying well yeah. Iwould put my child, I feel like th presener nature. Obviously, th basicdesire is o proeo child, but I really can't think how I could be. Okay withmy child, like you know, being home and Living Romalit like ay off food,bisiness oundess really feel it not wit the quesions Ait. For me, like yeah,you know like I might. I can imagine I. I love my child, my whole heart but honesty such a disgusting Art Valer meI feel like. I don't want one up for it. I want themto drop at on Fo and, I think ecause. I can't picture myself to that,especially that ages kind of like demented, almost ohe, W, obviouslyascidents happen belt thats, a real sews accident and the so hushnup shouldbe me to happen. N, it's hard to say, abut. I stin my ChilHa e to M. I would o firs because I would hat o Amiichs. I was a ech yeah'cause. I Wun want t reigate from CAUSCO, for whom, but that's the thing though 'cause nowyou have to like sit on an Bo Awa, a bachelor and, if necessary, need toorder. The same thing. We just talks about theenvironment that you're foltering at home, ut Lon more. What you're allowingyour child to be around outlight of the House that you're in a influence dothey have when they go outside owhere they hangin Oay to all that kind ofstuff, because I know like from having a young brother like the type of peoplethat young boys hang out with. They said they w about every thay yalledlate eep from the music right back on, so how he talks all that Yeaer, you noro but yeah. So I like for me, I couldn't hindle it. It wouldreally just brint. My heart obviously is someody else s Roui Sochol. You knowwho who had so much ting for them just with he their whole life ahead ofthem n. You know so many things that are nolike so far to return so olikely. So I would really. I would really need toow give that parent some sort of closureIE. You know this will happen. This is what's going to happen as resull andmits really complicated, and I don't think anybody pictes it because, as if you grew up not doing as Franzeshyou er real pictured, Childhoan, so kind O, get wit. Some parents on can a see certain trandsin Liy. Okay,don't do this o make sure they non. I Tash Sun it down, but yeah. That's a real triccule honesty. Ifeel like it really. It really isn't good for anybody involved, but I reallydon't think that te people at really I saw the young boy should getaway with this. Ok, maybe Napoj Move Onathing Nea ee, dop yeah something Ermore. I definitely does have that tbut. I also think the parents feed to befoldencomsible at some measure, because at that age, like therear certainthings that you just should not be doing by yourself because you are soyoung, I don't thin. My TN sent me sa any FRITCA at that age. Yet, like I'mpretty sure I had to wait till I was like closer to twelve yea around a Aitolike stay in the I is under illegal Israel yeah, I think it. The thing islike eleven ersme sometimeo do something like that. There should be other things that, as aparrent, you should be able to not asy...

...shelterbut, yes, an leme where yourchild con go. I know a lot of not a lot of parents. I know in theCaribbean there's a lot of. I don't want to call it a stigma.There's maybe a notion that certain people like just let their kids run,Lou like from a young age. You catch a bus home, you Goan by yourself. Youcould do this by yourself and just kind of leave them to their own devices.That may be a choice and it may not. They may have certain circumstances athome en in other areas of they're like that they're not able to be there, andI feel that I was mortion enough to like my parents, were there to pick meout from school or somebody else is there to pick me out or to tell mewhere it to Bor. Whatever the case was, everybody might not have that, but notthe end of today. That's your kid. So you have to take. You might not havebeen there, but you have to take some form ofresponsibility for the astions of your child. Such is your child. That's whyyour parents tress so much that when you trn eighteen, I can't protecte. Youanymore. Likemy parent said that I know other famiy nembers. That said that totheir kids, when they turned eighteen late, if the police come don on my doornow they come Oso Iam, not ain few, a impy vew Soovento that point tey.That's why I think some people might get mater want to tug when Ey Woll whenthey feel that their parents have ben over protective but a lot of e times.They have bhet intention, so t yeah, thit's very hard on themactually, but I'm Gointo try to get away from all of that know, because before Iraq or everything I have to OAleast Thatmanin, I at least let the people know who you guys are an justthe regular questions, iany other arentebener, which is why did you Gustart it? Why did you Bate tdeside? I mean you dad say so I listen to it, butI'm not going to review anything. So it's up to them who are watching to goand check it themselves if they wantd to find ot way. Butee won. I ask thequestion way to say to do a PARTCASS. Why? What was the idea behind it? Whydid you choose too young for an old? Do I mean I know why but imonosaying Keso for them who are watching? Why didyou choose that name? And you know what was the whole idea behind it? I think to start off late, we had afancy iners, a FM Wi. We want to use to put out there. He moves really downbetween a porcaste, blook and new as ARY against writing sheoiomspr Resin Ido't. I really don't like to do either yeah Al Uly. I don't wantto write. I don't want to write like okay, it's better o yeah. He said talking overwriting, so Isaid: okay, fine, like I'm fine with that I can do either so it ocal funnygoes I've done bloods in in college n, then we started doing it drink Olle toon Irlan owit Twe SA Muchin, but like it was just like he desire was MoresoYeah Tha te to Porus to somethingnw mhmanting. I there's, maybe I call itsocial they where it came from the concept asidefrom it being in codcast form was for me. I was we've been living UFHERE foralmost three years now. Yes, en pnmaybe, I don' K Ow h. He Ofrom talking to other people up here,...

...and the people bought home. I wasrealizing more like Thsi was pretty normal because we know it's very typical for astiit for n BCC,N ourvutable overseas. This has a norm. SEU Mor than Caribbean D up here, Thas,not lake people are like h. Why do leave barbitous to come here? A D, a AyS, gonna work n weather, just completely different, lihe or likeHu, but then they also funny in a way that made it seem thatwe had such an interesting intersactionality in terms of like ourage, the Fathat we were born and raised in barbades. No we've come over herefor school. Wer done persuing school almost done pursuing school moving intocareers up here, all that kind of stuff. So looking at it from that to us, itseemrmal tisusual like were we're, obviouslyprivileged to have the opportunities to come up here, but is not as far fetched as some people were making. It seem anso when we started to think Ati more and treatit like more of a uniqueexperience that we have, rather than just seeing it as norany old, and that's where the concept of thediscussions that we have come from in terms of name Um, her's to alive Yeahum, and then we weretrying to think of something that connected US subarbitous still in termsof dialectflying nemnologies. We just wedid Kindo like a word cloud, but we didn't actually draw it. We kindof justwer like shooting words knocking forth at each other, and then we came to old talk 'cause. II feel like I use that turn. Whenever I'm H 'cause you go to gatherings myparents hus just watct it al Old Tall Ater, even as Ol Theai' like can we gohome like write ao? Can we leave and everybody is boll talking, so we likethat herm and then we were wanting to kindlake com to use up pine connectthem, but then we ended out using a pinemecod. We wanted it to be too hrbut alson. Iwere too young altate when set is O wit, epares of an auto bicetof LAS F, ymmissionyo'really Hae Muco talk the last way it came out, andthat way, but hat was like funny a litle or making a little on you guysmade O fi o Rom canoen n. The old Menex got emlike wha. I wanted it. tolate Wi those Enen, I to't each other from AnopiloTho. We sent it to e designer, which is riht. Ten Hill O C was also a agentSyes, and then we also got the illustration done by another vasion, amoney money, I'm not sure whet her lost name is her.Instaram is art and Orodib or Nolia Art Acent eerything. Besides. Your podcast, ofcourse, is the anything else that you wild like to mention, promote talkabout that is going on in your life. Now, Thet just go for it just promoteit go ahead and the only other thing we have is ourfood bog. We say rusing eovated...

...initially, when we first came to Canada.We have a whole episode o about Tha Ot, so youas woil anshing, and you want toactually hear about it. TCK. You can go this so asually. Don't you guys Ho?What do you call it? The thing you just started this last e: Was it w before, where youwould do the Music Musin Myna Musin on Tegaera? So we used to do that as so.We used to do it for eart food blord Um. Then you know a couple of tencodifficulties and channing schedules. HBEEN ER, pausing it, but it kind of makes more sense to doit on our porecat. So we just M switch it up. Basically, Hick our taught three songs that we'listened to MHM for Thro the PAS late Wee, and then we share them on Mondays,onour insiganceries and your Portosey o. When erpacost comes what days, FrdayReso every satifiring, N, utiful Snowa the afternoon Lik twelve one two, butit's alway, not a amon honesty. If it's Notuh rose a call m c the EE eleven, nobody have to pay asSOM brother and is on some Clothe Apple, music, Oti, F, F, I overcast oe podcastradio, podcast anywhere. You can listen to the TORBOR ASIS there wel guys um first of all, go and follow them Um. Itoo, young Orol Tal, is on Instagram O on clotes par Ay, all of those thatthey just mentioned and Thankyou guys wer joining me todayon Waystay partgas Um. It was obsolute pleasure to go ing to your episodefirst and then do this one with a much more serious topic so going chack othere episode. I was in Deala with the ninety five verses entreprenurships andall that so theywill release that hop. I don't know if it will be Saturday,but if they don't remind them, as they just sad state tunes to die episode aswell and as well going check thelaapoat I did with the ampontrepreneur Um. Idon't want to redeace our name yet 'cause, IT'S NOT OT! Yet T's, notHolyogon, ch Bu know when this is going up. It should be ITERBE. So F, there'snot a rol semocrat yeah, please do'cause! They should be goingoff this week if it is as a problem M, but yeah go follo them ar they saidGond Chak them listen to their all their portcast um again ti Yo guys werejoinn me Ather Thanai. Yes, te problem subscribed on below hit the blike onlight sher on hat the mother sed, and I will see you guys for another video n.

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